lucymorningstar: (Fluffy)
J, as I just posted over in his DW for him, has gone off with a couple of his old air force buddies. They're on their motorbikes and they're going fishing over in France. I probably think fishing is a euphemism for drinking a lot of beer and reminiscing about old times but they'll have a good time I'm sure.

S had a surprise unexpected day off. Something to do with the electrics and there being none. I do like getting to spend time with S, we don't do it often enough. I've been feeling a little twitchy because my routine has been off but it's been worth it.

We had a lazy start to the morning, some bdsm and sex fun then took the dogs out for a walk on the beach. in the rain. We were chasing each other in and out of the water - since we were already wet we didn't care about splashes and the dogs were playing too. Wet sand gets everywhere! We got the dogs clean and dry, then took a shower together. You can imagine where that went... haha. What can I say, my S is a sexy sexy woman and I can't keep my hands off her

After a rejuvenating nap, we had lunch out, took our time enjoying the meal and talking and being with each other. It was really nice. Good food, good company. We strolled through town for a bit (hand-in-hand, saw some of her students, probably confused them) and did a little bit of shopping - S got a beautiful flowery summer dress and a denim jacket, I got a suedette biker jacket.

This evening we just cuddled up on the couch and watched a movie, provided a suitable napping spot for the cats.

Tomorrow, if she's free and the weather is nice, we're going to head to Penrhyn Castle for the day, catch one of the Early Bird tours.
We're thinking of taking ourselves for a girly weekend to a spa, make the most of J being away.
lucymorningstar: (Harry)
J and I have both lost weight over the last few months.

I've been actively trying for the last year and have lost 45lb, hit my target and am very very proud of myself. I've been making an effort to eat heathier, drink more water, only eat when I'm hungry, get exercise regularly.

J, the little shit, hasn't been trying and has unintentionally lost 30lb since Christmas. Which isn't fair but I'm very proud of him and damn he looks good right now. That man is sexy, you know?

To reward us, S took us both shopping. I was very happy about this. I love shopping for clothes and I've got some new dresses, some new jeans, some new tops, new underwear, had my hair done. It's like I've spring cleaned myself!

J... was a lot less happy about it. Honestly, the way he was going on you'd think we were torturing him or something. He actually ended up really pissing S off and oh boy, he got into trouble. Let's just say he got intimately acquainted with the cane this afternoon and I'm not sure he's gonna be sitting down anytime soon. He's also on a sex and orgasm ban for the rest of the month. I feel a bit bad for him but really he brought it on himself.

Family

Apr. 23rd, 2016 08:57 am
lucymorningstar: (Black Widow)
I ended up having a soak in the tub last night, before curling up in bed and watching a couple of episodes of Arrow. I took a sleeping pill so I was able to sleep kind of ok, although I feel fuzzy and weird this morning.

I've done an online grocery shop which will be delivered tomorrow. It felt weird not going around the store with J - a lot less fun doing it that way! Cheaper too.

I'm currently curled up in bed still, eating chocolate granola, listening to some music and writing out my to-do list for today. I want to spend some time playing around with different layouts for weekly and monthly spreads in my bullet journal.
I also want to add a links page to my website over at http://lucyshiningone.wordpress.com

I'm actually going to recommend this song. It's called My Name Is Trouble by a band called Jess & The Bandits


Um. So a couple of you asked yesterday about what J's family know about us. J's family don't know about me. He had a very strained relationship with them anyway - he's the youngest and the black sheep in many ways. They disagreed with a lot of the choices he's made - they're very, proper, I guess. They flipped when he divorced his first wife. They never approved of S. His son from his first marriage is the only person who knows (that we know of)
S's close family - her dad and brother - know. Her dad mostly just laughed and said one person would never be enough for S to worry about!
My parents only know about J - and were worried enough about the age difference. J is only one years younger than my mum! My older brother and younger sisters knows, I don't know what my older sister knows.

We all decided between us so J's family not knowing about me doesn't bother me. It's more that I want to be there for him. I love him and he's hurting and I'm feeling helpless. I know there wasn't anything I could really do even if I was there but even so!
lucymorningstar: (Sunbeam)
Today being Thursday was my regular day with S. A lot of it is unrepeatable in polite company but lets say we enjoyed ourselves a lot, many times over. Starting with a lay in, then most of the morning in bed, then a shower. Followed by another shower and fluffy warm towels.
You can't go wrong starting the day like that, not really.

We ambled around town - mostly because I was looking for a dot grid notebook, preferably a cheap one to start off with rather than jumping in with a more expensive one. I tried sketching out pages for the bullet journal in an existing lined notepad but it didn't quite work for me. I'd seen a notepad I wanted on Amazon for about £3 but thought somewhere like Staples or Wilkinson's would have one.

They did not. Apparently nowhere in town had one. Trust me, we looked in enough places. This is a student town... how does no-one stock this item? We did however find great deals on Diet Coke, chocolate and some scrapbook ideas for S.

We got home and ended up ordering the Moleskine in blue - as well as a few more maths workbooks. I'm not looking into pens at the moment, will stick to my trust black biro while I get going. Pens are always something I can look into later if I stick to this.
I'm looking forward to them coming so I can get started! :)

Maths... definitely let me down this afternoon. I was working on simplifying fractions and got so frustrated that there were tears. A cuddle, some chocolate and I calmed down. S and I worked out that it was my struggle with multiplication tables that was causing my troubles so I wrote out a table. I was nearly finished when S leans over and asks me if I'd forgotten something.
I had... the entire six times table.

S looks at me in this combination of stern and amused and silly and ask me if I think I need disciplining. I agree that I do and I get six strikes with a leather strap. Ouch! I also have to repeat all my tables by rote - and then write out all twelve tables.
Lets just say I got them write this time!

English was much easier today. More parts of language - and adverbs. Adverbs being words that describe verbs, telling you how the action is being done. Like slowly or or neatly or wildly.
I wonder if I could encorporate some kind of English Grammar spread into my bullet journal?

This evening involved a lot of being curled up on the couch with S, me playing with her hair. We watched some Stargate on DVD, I read a bit.

And now it's time for bed!
lucymorningstar: (Coulson)
Things are getting back to normal around here, finally! J went back to work today. S is being incredibly stubborn and trying not to let this gastroenteritis get her down, but J was firm with her and told her to stay home, at least for today, and rest.

S and I did to to the supermarket today to get the groceries no-one got at the weekend and just that was enough to send her back to bed for a nap, so at least we know J was right. She's sort of half-working and half-resting.

I've been able to get back on with as normal as my life gets around here, which makes me feel better. Following my lists and knowing what I'm doing is always a good thing.

Speaking of lists, a couple of days ago I posted about some belated goals that I'd put together for the year, a little list that looks like:
1) Keep taking my medication regime and tracking my moods and attention etc
2) Keep using to-do lists and alarms to focus myself on my task at hand
3) Lose approximately 30lb by the end of 2016
4) Start studying my GCSEs - ideally English and Maths as well as Physics
5) Learn to type

Well, inspired by Kara @ www.bohoberry.com's very popular style bullet journal, I've decided to something a little similar myself. Breaking the big goals down into steps that make them seem less daunting.

4 BIG GOALS



  1. RETAIN CURRENT MENTAL HEALTH LEVELS

  2. LOSE 30 LB

  3. TAKE GCSES IN ENGLISH, MATHS AND SCIENCE - AT MINIMUM

  4. LEARN TO TYPE


ACTION STEPS FOR APRIL



  • RETAIN CURRENT MENTAL HEALTH LEVELS

    1. Keep taking medications


      • Fill pill older on Sunday evenings

      • Alarms set on phone when medications are due

      • Including medications on daily to-do lists and Habitica


    2. Using to-do lists and Habitica for focus

    3. Attending therapy and group sessions

    4. Weekly reward for all medications taken -need to discuss/set with J&S




  • LOSE 30LB

    1. Cut out excessive unhealthy snacks - replace chocolate/crisps with carrot sticks/rice cakes

    2. Keeping a daily food log

    3. Investigate eating programs such as Whole30

    4. Weekly weight loss reward -need to discuss/set with J&S




  • TAKE GCSES

    1. Continue daily maths missions on Khan Academy

    2. Pull together a list of revision guides, workbooks and stationery needed, along with price

    3. Discuss turning 2nd floor storage room into a small study room - price of desk, cupboards etc

    4. Weekly reward -need to discuss/set with J&S




  • LEARN TO TYPE

    1. General use of computer, familiarising myself with keyboard layout

    2. Try a couple of diffrent online 'courses' to find a good fit

    3. Weekly reward - what parameters? -need to discuss/set with J&S



Tonight, depending on how J feels, S wants us to all sit down and work on rewards. And whether or not I should be disciplined for failing in the tasks - since these are all mine, not set by them - and what the parameters etc would be.

I'm planning on starting an actual physical bullet journal too, but because we were all sick, S didn't take me to Hobbycraft at the weekend to buy supplies. Perhaps that will be my reward this weekend for doing my maths everyday?

I'm feeling quite positive about most of these. A little nervous at the idea of actually prepping to do exams, but that's quite a way ahead in the future still. I'm just trying to get used to the idea. Although hopefully if I continue to enjoy the maths the way I am with Khan, and find equally enjoyable/working methods for other subjects then I think I'll be fine!

S is quite firm that none of these interfere with my existing duties/roles as they were. I've been fitting in the Khan Academy quite easily though over the last couple of weeks, and there's been no complaints about housework so I think I'm going to succeed quite nicely! :)

Keeping a food log will begin properly next week. This week, because we've all been so ill, is going to consist of a lot of pretty bland food - the old BRAT diet: bananas, rice, applesauce, toast. Simple proteins like egg and chicken. Crackers. Then next week, paying proper attention to calories and carbs etc.

I can do this!
lucymorningstar: (Brand New)
Saturdays have always been me and J's day together. (Thursday is my day with S, she has no classes that day). We started off going grocery shopping, probably my least favourite chore and I could never do it alone. It stresses me out and is the time my psychosis is likely to trigger, and I struggle telling what's real and what isn't. I've been known to walk around talking to imaginary people and thinking I'm picking up one thing when it's completely different.

Although going around a supermaket with J is somewhat akin to going with a child "That's not on the list, J", or "S won't be happy if you bring that home." But he has fun and he has the cutest smile, still makes me weak to the knees.

We came home with just enough extras to make S roll her eyes and swat J on the ass heh. Not me, since I'm his responsibility when we're alone. But we did manage to bring home everything that was on the list. Why she doesn't just do it herself when she's so particular about it, I don't know!
Probably because she'd kill J in the middle of an aisle or something ;)

J, old man that he is, decided he needed an afternoon nap. He also decided that he needed me to nap with him. Safe to say there was a lot more kissing and cuddling and fucking than there was actual napping, but laying half asleep and thoroughly orgasmic in his arms is definitely a favourite place to be. Even if S busted us eating chocolate. I mentioned yesterday that S told me I was going on a diet. Well, J and I managed to bring home half the store's worth of half-price Easter chocolate. And part of the cuddling involved an Easter egg being eaten. She just stood there, leaning against the door frame, arms crossed and trying to decide if she was annoyed or amused.

I'm not the only one who's being denied tasty treats now. J is sulking. It's cute. Ever seen a 63 year old guy sulking because his chocolate was taken away from him?
At least he won't get enforced exercise because of his age and the fact he has bad knees! S is a big believer in punishment fitting the crime.

Although, while we were 'napping', S has installed a bunch of updates on my laptop and set it up to work with the printer through the wireless network. She's a bit of a computer nerd is my S! Which is a good job since I'm pretty clueless and J is probably more likely to throw it out of the window!

I've found a promising looking typing teaching website so I'll be looking at that tomorrow. See if I can get more than just my index fingers in on the action. I have no idea how long it's supposed to take to learn though, but there's 15 lessons, so probably a couple of weeks.

Other than that, it's been a pretty standard Saturday around here. Sheets and bedding changed, laundered and put away. Everywhere's clean and tidy and it's time for our usual weekend family movie night. S is being evil and making herself some popcorn in the microwave, and I know me and J won't be allowed any. It looks like J's choosing Rock Of Ages so that should be fun.

Hope you're all having a good Saturday xxx

Croeso!

I'm Lucy, a 30-something woman who is trying to figure out this whole 'life' thing.

I'm bisexual and poly, living in North Wales with my partners J&S. I'm a home maker, love to bake and cook, and am a huge sci-fi fan. I'm also a little obsessed with journals/planners right now.

I haved lived for so long under the shadow of a number of mental health diagnoses, letting them define me rather than just be part of me. For too long I've been "Lucy the Schizo" and I want to find out who 'Lucy' is

Welcome aboard my journey. I'm glad you're here and looking forward to getting to know you as we get to know me!

♥ Current Obsessions ♥
Aliens. Angels. Atlantis. Bullet Journals. Cryptozoology. Doctor Who. German. Lucifer. MacGyver 2016. Marvel. Maths. Mythology. Space. Star Wars. Time travel

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